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[12 Feb 2006|09:51pm]

something to make you all smile

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[16 Nov 2005|08:10pm]

[ mood | bored ]


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i haven't seen anyone write here in a while ... y'all still read it?? [06 Apr 2005|05:12pm]

does anyone know where i can find a free online graphing calculator???
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[15 Mar 2005|10:08pm]

i still don't know how to put pitcures in my lj! girrrrrrr and no one will help me!
so if you can please leave a comment!

and please don't say photobucket ! i can't have a photobucket because i am 15(you have to b 16)

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[15 Mar 2005|06:49pm]

hmm well before i star my rant you should know that at mercy there are 2 speech teachers, Mr. and Mrs. Sill..i have mrs. sill and the girl has mr. right now we are doing a sales speech where we basically have to sell a product....and i chose grow-a-boyfriends (yes...its random XD)

ok well i was practicing my speech with one of my "friends" this morning and she told me it was really cute and she liked the idea. she ended up writing her speech later that hour (we weren't together) and using the almost exact same speech, even selling the grow-a-boyfriend. so now i cant use my speech because she has basically the same one and it really pisses me off...and since she already gave her speech and mine isnt due until friday it will look like i copied her. plus, its not like i can talk to my teacher because she won't be in school until friday. i know we have 2 different teachers but mr. and mrs. sill are married (obviously) and if they talk about it i'm screwed...hes also come in and watched our class before. ...ahhhh i hate people that use you. it pisses me off.

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[13 Mar 2005|07:04pm]

[ mood | sad ]

hi you guys im new here

my names orianna

i live in nashua nh

im 13 years old

problemosCollapse )

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you should all check this out [12 Mar 2005|11:12pm]

I will not stand for this
Everyone Feels This Pain
Show your support
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if you are in a library do not talk on your phone! [12 Mar 2005|05:33pm]

[ mood | annoyed ]

yea there is a girl at the library that i am at now who is talking very loudly on a cell phone and she needs to quit or go outside
she has been on the phone 20 min!
I swear if i wasn't a calm person...


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[09 Mar 2005|11:19pm]


please help <3Collapse )

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[07 Mar 2005|05:14pm]

yesterday was the second time i've been stood up
not by the same guy thank goodness
what did i do to deserve this?
am i doing something wrong?
how can i avoid this?
i mean.. he said that his mom is really bitchy when it comes to hw and she took his cell, wouldnt let him use aim or the phone.. so he couldnt get a hold of me..
but its kinda a lame excuse, right?
theres kinda more but i dont feel like typing everything..
should i forgive him?
please comment and give advice
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[07 Mar 2005|04:29pm]
Thanks to everyone who did help me out... thanks to: _____cixelsyd for giving me the obvious clue to paint my room orange. that must have sounded pretty weird to most people. i can't believe none of you have ever heard of it. anyways. I think i really like this community thing, its allowing me just to ramble on and then listening to what other people can say to me and how other people relate to me...

this one girl at my school came up to me today and asked me if i was okay becuase i looked like crud, so i somewhat explained that i have been pretty "depressed" and she pulled up her shirt and showed me her stomach with burns and scratches, then she pulled me into the bathroom and showed me her arms that had burn and scratches all the way up and down.. she said it has helped her a lot.. she also stated that she does it with her pencil, her razor, and her dinner fork..

i am thinking of re-trying this to relieve some of my pain.. but i don't know if i want to become "addicted" to it..

xx help me xx
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The Problems with Life.... [06 Mar 2005|06:58pm]

[ mood | Life doesn't matter. ]

Hello. I'm new to this community, I kind of hope it will help me. If it doesn’t, oh well, I guess everything’s worth a shot…Right?

So, about me. My name is Kilara, and yes that’s my real name, pretty unique huh? I attend a college preparatory school that’s really advanced, so I guess you can say I’m pretty smart. I’m in eighth grade, fourteen, and taking an advanced math class with a bunch of freshmen. If you’re confused, my school goes from seventh to twelfth grade and there are only like thirty children per grade. My school is really small, I hate it. I like being in the hustle and bustle of big schools. I like being able to get lost in the crowd, staying out of everyone’s way so no one will notice me. But now, I can’t do that anymore. It kind of annoys me. And I somehow feel more insecure in such a small community of children. I feel like everyone can see right through me and know what thoughts go through my head. Like everyone can see my soul. I don’t like people knowing who I really am; I try to hide myself from the world. But anyway, that’s enough of school. All you need to know about my school is that it drives me insane.

I guess you can say I’m depressed, I’m never happy. I’ve umm…I’ve cut myself before. Twice, actually, and it made me feel a lot better. But now…I’m not so sure it was the smartest idea I’ve ever made because, well…It’s addicting. Every time I get upset now I’m always tempted to cut myself again.

So what leads to my depression? Obviously if I’ve never been able to tell anyone, I’m not about to tell a bunch of people online. But, I guess I can tell you that it probably all started with my family. It’s my dad, I hate him. I always have. It’s just, I’ve started thing him more and more and now everything he does to me and my mother send me deeper and deeper into this void that threatens to consume me. I don’t know, I guess I’m just easily angered, easily brought to tears, easily everything! But you know what, I don’t really care. I am who I am and nothing anyone has to say can do anything about it.

So anyway, that’s probably all I’m going to tell you. Feel free to analyze me, since that’s what you all do here. Let me know what you think. If it’s any good maybe I’ll talk to you guys again sometime. If not…? Oh well, I tried didn’t I?

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Vote on your favorite banner: [06 Mar 2005|06:48pm]

[ mood | discontent ]

Banners inside:Collapse )

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try and fix this.. [06 Mar 2005|06:18pm]

[ mood | apathetic ]

Try to fix my problems in my life...
At school I roam through the halls wondering who is actually my true friends there. I look at the people who I used to be so close with give up on me. I feel like no at my school wants to listen to me, or even try to understand me, except for a select few... but I cant even really say anything becuase they dont even have all my trust. I geuss I have just been backstabbed so many times that I have given up on giving people my trust. Going to a school of 1200 i geuss you would probably say, "go find another group of friends and you will find some who will accept you for who you are".. but dealing with the fact that i go to a private school of about 240 kids in the whole 4 grades doesnt give me much options of a class of 55. That isnt how I want to spend my highschool career. How do I know if I even have true friends. I can only trust really my friends from another school nearby who i used to school with, or a girl who lives on a farm...
Fix that.

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[05 Mar 2005|11:17pm]

[ mood | infuriated ]

wow. well, um tonight i was gonna go to the movies with my friends for a 7:30 show. well i call 5 people (no names). 3 say they cant. the other 2 say they'll call me back by 6. well so i dont hear from any of them by 6 and call them on-and-off til 7, not reaching them. then i give up figuring they live far from the theatre and obviously wont be able to go. and it pisses me off that they didn't even call back to say they couldn't! i mean i didn't even have time to invite anyone else!! they totally ruined my whole night. and this isnt the first time. so anyways i go online at 7 and the one says no they can't. then i didn't actually hear from the other until 11 tonight when they were online.. and i had to IM them. yes i had to im them. how awful is that?! oh and the reason for not calling me back you ask? yeah she took a nap. TOOK A GOD DAMN NAP and even if she didn't want to go, couldn't she have told me she just didnt want to go? GOD! ..and this isnt the first time this happened. i'll have to vent some other time about that story.. and the others..

so my mom and i got applebee's carside-to-go and rented little black book.. i love my family. :)

wow, this community is my new best friend. thanks for listening.

4 comments|post comment

[05 Mar 2005|11:11pm]
Hello I am new here. I am new to the whole "livejournal thing".. latly I have been really sad with my life, no one is able to understand me when I really need them too. But when it comes to when I dont want to talk at all thas when they bother me with no good questions. The only person I can really talk to is my step brother from my mothers 4th marriage. him and me are pretty darn close.. i mean we sorta had a relationship.. but then his dad proposed to my mom and we couldnt deal with it anymore. we now are just "good friends" with good benefits in my room when the parentals arent home.

I am not into the whole starving yourself when your depressed, but latly i have no appetite for food. I am hungry but i am too lazy too eat. its weird. Some people say i look like an anorexic becuase im only 104lbs, but its not my fault that i dont have an appetite, and i am not just gonna eat to eat.... what am i supposed to do?

I geuss my lj name may seem like i am "a depressed emo kid" but im just not happy anymore. I cant even take my life anymore, i wish i had an isolated room where i couldnt talk to anyone and the walls were just the color orange. I hear orange takes all the pain away... will orange take my pain away? do you think the color orange will demise my thoughts and cure my dreams? Orange.

Well see if you can help me with my life, am i a screwup or what?
1. i pretty much had an "incest" relationship with my stepbrother
2. im somwhat starving myself
3. orange is my get a way

Help Me. Cure Me.
xx sad girl xx
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[05 Mar 2005|01:55pm]

[ mood | bouncy ]

Now come on people! Lets hear your shit! VENT!.. well if you don't want to vent, promote us! We need more people!

3 comments|post comment

[05 Mar 2005|10:48am]

[ mood | confused ]

hey everyone! i'm new here, and i have plenty of issues... ah, good times.

6 comments|post comment

[05 Mar 2005|11:22am]

hello i am new!
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[05 Mar 2005|10:47am]

someone be kind and help us with the layout.

and promote!

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

use that and provide a link.

k help out yo.
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